Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Torture by sweater

I'm not quite sure why the Geneva Convention has not listed knitting your first sweater along with water-boarding as an illegal torture method?

I mean really, I would have confessed to almost any war crime if someone had just attached and knitted the collar for me. I attached and knit it three time before it was right. (Drop Stitch Cardigan from Interweave Knits, Fall 2005)

I would have agreed to rat out all my buddies if they promised that I would not have to ever again sew seams, tear them out and redo them correctly.

And now the prospect of the button band awaits me. I mean, what have I done to deserve being in sweater prison. At this point I'm so sick of the variegated purples and grays, and the way the color pools. I may just ceremoniously burn the sweater once I totally finished it. Like a prisoner getting revenge on a malicious jail guard.

Ok, ok, I know this is self imposed. No one is holding a gun to my head to force me to knit more and more challenging patterns. Take a deep breathe. Remember knitting is suppose to be how a rid myself of the work a day stresses and aggrevations of life. Yes, relax, relax. I need a knitting guru to give me a mantra for each new loop on the needle.

But, the real question is, am I crazy for having just ordered 10 skeins of Maroon Lily Chin for my next sweater? The Minimalist Cardigan from Interweave Fall 2007?

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